| shallower than your average magician. |
[14 Jul 2009|12:02am] |
This hot dog is to bloody dieeeeeeeee for. I dont care what they say, the street vendors here know EXACTLY what they are doing. fuckkkk. I could die happy now. right now. right this minute.
well alright then, mebbe not THIS minute am actually plannin on living a long an full life, thanks. I've also developed a newfound love o acid jazz, thanks much moffatttttt.
Oh hey, bloody important question. Any drivers out there? Drivers willin to do someone a few solid favours? I might need your assistance. Help. Aid. Ayudame. Assistez-moi.
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| the magus gets things in order. ish. |
[07 Jun 2009|01:02am] |
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8 simple rules (ish) in the land of jack collier:
1) don't drink my whiskey.
2) but we can share the beer.
3) I go out on friday nights, every fuckin friday night. Shiny, pretty people welcome to join. Im always up for meetin new friends.
4) Zara, doyou still have that book thing?
5) if you need any sort of ~emotional closure~ with sommun who's passed, I can help. No, seriously. It's my Thing. My Schtick. I'm magic.
6) How do you get started gettin a drivers licence. halp.
7) Dont sleep with my sister or I'll fuckin kill you. You can hit on her, though, that's ok.
8) Is it a good or bad idea for people like us to get into comics? DISCUSS.
Okay, they weren't all rules, but whatevvver.
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| jack wants some cheese with that whine. |
[14 Jan 2009|12:14am] |
Well, my tv's broken on account o dead zombie limbs flyin unexpectedly into it. how am i sposed to watch nickelodeon's fresh prince of bel air marathon now, eh?
right bloody shame
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| jack starts considering occupations. |
[20 Dec 2008|01:13am] |
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so I'm watchin this special on stage magicians, right, an it's called ~masters of illusion~ (tony clark's on right now, whoever the fuck that is)
Regardless, these guys are pretty fuckin awesome. maybe I should bceome a professional magician. it'd be cheating, of course, but hey -- what d'you think of xover representing the next david copperfield, huh? :D
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| an englishman in new york. |
[27 Nov 2008|07:31pm] |
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THANK GOD FOR THE FOLLOWING:
• meat
• beer (I am such a man, ohoho)
• heated blankets!
• fast-response saviours
• tantric yoga (THIS CLASS IS BLOODY AMAZING)
• food
• unemployment
• macy day parade and the rickrolling of
• M-A-G-I-C
• food
• no demons or monsters or fuckpigs, oh my!
• alcohol
• immigrants
• badgering me aunt an uncle on the phone
• leadership of our fine community going to the young and fabulous, though I am mighty disappointed I didn't get some sort of DC shout-out. :[
• did you know me comic turned 20 this year? That's worth some sort o birthday celebration, yeah?
• turkeys. they are delicious.
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| [Posted via phone.] |
[22 Nov 2008|02:44am] |
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COCK BUGGER BALLS SHIT FUCKING CHRIST THE POWER'S OUT
and
i'm stuck in the bloody elevator
Anyone feel like being a good samaritan because I could really use it, christ I hate my timing.
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| my life over the past 24 hrs |
[02 Nov 2008|01:27am] |
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mood |
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hungover, maybe |
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HELLO BEAUTIFUL NEW YORKERS
Right, so: I left Heathrow on Thursday or Friday, with the timezone differences I honestly can't tell anymore, right, and I landed 7 hours later only to hear something about some Halloween shindig? But I couldn't find the fuckin venue so I ended up on someone's rooftop party, an there was lots of good liquor and fine women so I guess it was all right then
And at some point someone gave me this flyer for a class on tantric sex.
They've got some spaces left. You know. If anyone wants to join in on the highly educational seminar :]
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